Episode 17 - Paul Boggie

Recovering heroin addict and Queen's Guard

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Summary intro

Paul Boggie battled heroin for 7 yrs, then turned life around to become a Queen’s guard, one of the world’s toughest army regiments. Follwing leaving the army Paul spreads his  insights into addiction, determination & lessons learned.

Transcript

[Music] Hello I’m Marcus Railton and this is the Scotscare podcast. Scotscare is the only charity dedicated to helping disadvantaged Scots in London through a range of support including mental health therapy, financial grants, advocacy, sheltered housing for older Scots, job coaching, social events, befriending and support for Children and Families.,

The Charity’s been running for 400 years to help break the cycle of poverty experienced by some Scots.

In this series of the scotscare podcast I’ll be chatting to celebrities and supporters of the charity that have also forged a life in the capital away from home and about the ups and downs that can bring.

Scotscare: supporting Scots away from home in London.

Joining me on the podcast today is former Queen’s Guard author and playwright Paul Boggie. Paul was raised in Edinburgh and by 18 was running with a gang and hooked on heroin. His addiction lasted seven long years, nearly killing him, until he managed to turn his life around. Paul went from heroin to hero guarding the queen at Buckingham Palace and spending five years in one of the UK’s toughest regiments. During lockdown he wrote a book about his life decided to give all the profits to charity and when it was turned into a play for the Edinburgh Fringe it received rave reviews. It’s great to be able to chat to him today [Music]

Hello Paul.

Hello Marcus.

Thanks for coming on the scotscare podcast.

You’re more than welcome.

I’ve read a lot about you recently and one of the things that that’s come up a couple of times that I wanted to ask you about just because it’s not a lot it’s not something I know a lot about, is that you describe yourself as a recovering addict and I was wondering will you always describe yourself as a recovering addict or is there one day where you say that’s not how I identify anymore?

Yeah the truth is no addict will ever be recovered which was a term that I used to use when I first got clean off heroin people used to ask me um are you in recovery and I would always say no I’m recovered because I don’t take the drugs anymore, but the truth of the matter is that I’m always going to be in recovery till the day I die and so will every addict it’s partly who we are and we always have to be mindful of you know the triggers and the reasons why they take drugs, and all those sorts of things we always have to be mindful of that, because unfortunately once upon a time we were an addict as as part of who we are, we can’t just turn off you know, even after we stop taking drugs so unfortunately um you know it’s always going to be there so I will always be in recovery. See are you always mindful of it in yourself and I’m not saying it’s front of mind every single day when you get up and you’re having your Shreddies or something but it’s always is it always part of you thinks that could be a misstep one day or this is just this is just me you know that it happened once it could happen again yeah well I mean I’m I’m 18 years of heroin now so you know that’s a lifetime and itself Marcus and I know deep down I will never take heroin ever again until the day I die I know that um I don’t have to fight and my mind every day you know to refrain myself from going in my local heroin dealer and getting a bag I don’t have to do that.

I think that’s what I was wondering whether it is you know I think like alcoholism can be that way we are every you know day by day you’re thinking that’s another day where I’ve got through it without thinking about having a beer or something.

No and it’s just not it’s not like that for me um obviously everybody’s different but it’s not like that for me I talk about heroin every single day on social media every single day I’m doing live videos with people um I talk a lot on my own as well and I am discussing my life how I stopped and that’s a continued thing where I’m always the word heroin is always coming up I’m always reliving moments in my life to try and help other people understand how I stopped so even things like that they’re not a trigger for me in the sense that when I’m when I’m thinking about a time past when I used to take heroin and it felt amazing when I’m discussing and telling people about that it’s not a trigger for me to think oh you know in my mind I’m reliving those moments and how amazing would it be to go get a bag of heroin right now because you’ve got these memories of when it was amazing um you know it’s just not like that um how do I nearly destroy my life

but you’re using it now it’s interesting I spoke to someone last week who was talking about having negative thoughts

to drive positive actions and that’s kind of what you do these days isn’t it you kind of you’re thinking about parts

of your life and talking about parts of your life to other people that we’re negative in order to drive like in a

positive stimulus yeah well the life that I’ve LED the way that I feel about it now is

all the crap that I went through hasn’t been for nothing you know I’m now

giving back and sharing how I stopped heroin and the hope that

other people can perhaps try out the way that I’ve done it and get into long-term recovery as well

so it’s amazing for me it’s amazing for me it’s not to be alive and I’m grateful

for it you know and it’s amazing for me to be helping addicts every single day the way that I do because

you know so I won one and I say that quite a lot Marcus it’s one of those things Attica great deal

helping people from my own personal Mental Health and the people that are receiving some

of the knowledge and experience that I’ve got and taken on board in their own personal lives they’re winning as well

so let’s go back to the beginning then Paul where were you brought up because you sound like you’re from the other side of the country from me so I’m on

the East Coast I was dropping East Coast Edinburgh yeah because as Glasgow born and bred you know you’re not a hips fan

or something ridiculous like that are you Paul yes I am yeah right no I’ve only kidding I can’t

speak I’m a party that’s all fun all right all right definitely can’t speak good so you were born and brought up in

Edinburgh I used to work in Edinburgh in the 90s in Leith docks I worked in a radio station in East docks and this is

before the Parliament and there was nothing there Paul it was just it was just a wasteland it was just chaos there

what was it what was your school like because the nearest thing we had when I was going to school for a uniform was a Rangers top which was old school

academy you know and we but we had the new school so I was the first first year

in the new school so everything was all brand new you know at school school was

okay I was a bit of a clown I never really engaged that much I was more about having a joke and I laugh with

everyone um jumping around with all my daft’s friends I knew really

I was I always put things off remember the first year I was like oh I’ll concentrate next year

and I’ll do something and then the second year I’ll do it third year and before I knew it I’m finishing fourth

year 16 you know and I’m looking at getting a job because I want to earn money and the

realization that I never really pushed on at school like what I could have I could have been a lot more

intelligent Marcus than what I am I know that but you know it’s one of those things it’s life and I certainly don’t

lose any sleep sitting thinking or you know if I’m stuck in at school I could have been a

doctor or a solicitor right now um you know what’s meant for me

won’t go buy me it’s tough though until you know I have this discussion with my boy my older boy who’s 13 and I could

have watched skill slip by him a lot you know and I’m saying you’re gonna stick in you got to stop getting the detentions you’re gonna stop shouting

out in class and what I’m happy about now for kids when I look at the support

network he has around them it’s got you know football clubs doodle clubs boxing clubs and I don’t think we had that I

mean I’m slightly older than you but we never had that when I was growing up as part of my school no and that’s that was

a big part in the drug taking the drug drug abuse for us growing up I was in a

gang you know for a very very early age and you know there’s maybe like 30 40 50

years used to hang around at school and there was nothing for us to do the

age the age is within the gang you know there’s some eight-year-olds and there’s some 25 year olds so and it was a whole

array of different ages and they all just used to hang around but you know these older guys

who some of them are alcoholics you know they they were able to go to the shop and buy bottles they made it down

bottles a buck fast vodka candy lager and they would bring it within the within the gang so we all had access to

it very easily Scott’s care [Music]

to break the cycle of death

was a gateway drugs like alcohol or cannabis before heroin then yeah so these drugs were always on the scene for

primary school age there was alcohol all the time

um cannabis is all the time um glue sniffing gas sniffing there was pills on the on

the scene I never touched for me personally I didn’t like drinking alcohol um I’ve done it because everybody else

was doing it but I didn’t like the feeling um I smoked cannabis

doesn’t like the feeling but again I’m doing it because everybody else is doing it you know so and people talk about

gateway drugs and it can be the case for me it wasn’t at all

for me it was it was different and for all my friends who ended up lost on that drug

um it wasn’t a Gateway it was lucky education and this is this is a

thing for you know my mom and dad told me heroin kills schools told me that heroin

kills so I had this belief growing up that heroin kills so when I was 18

and me and I cousin of my friends you know maybe occasional occasionally smoke

cannabis occasionally have a few beers we will never hear the drink or you know and

heroin comes on the scene and obviously everybody was different the reasons why I would start to take head-on in the

first place I was very naive I’m chasing the dragon yeah I read that that you never injected

you and and therefore I read that you said you were you were of the mind that

you probably couldn’t get addicted when you were 18 you know because you weren’t injecting no we used to joke about it

and laugh about it in the car on our way to get heroin with my friends sadly they’ve passed away because of the drug

abuse but we usually laugh in the car looking at each other and saying you’ll get addicted fast Paul you’ll get

addicted first it’ll definitely be you and I’d be like no it’s going to be you I’m used to joke and laugh about it

totally naive and to think because it wasn’t a belt a spoon on a needle and

I’ve only putting I want to inject in there we couldn’t get addicted and how wrong we were and like I said there you

know I’ve lost um sadly a lot of lovely people um there were great guys and they’re

sadly no longer reals because like me they became addicted but they

weren’t able to find they weren’t able to find their way out and they they stayed on on the hard

drugs for Forever Until the past seven years until you were 25 but you

were also working at the same time so you were holding down a job and earning cash which I presume you use the cash to

buy buy heroin and you were functional so it wasn’t like you were just non-functional lying around

no the first two years I worked full-time sitting in booted you know I worked in a big office in Edinburgh I’m

only I’ll mostly the name of the company I was out there but I’m not going to see it um you know and I was going to be a pack

of heroin in my sock with my folded up tent foil you know I was a meal room attendant so my job was to deliver mail

and I just used to go into the toilets and the Toyota swim my tin foil and sit

and Chase a dragon on the cubicle and I used to be questioned and I’d say oh it’s my sinuses I put hay fever I’ve not

been sleeping very well excuses and it used to work you know and people would not us you know and over time of course

physically handling stocks to take its toll mentally it also starts to take its tone

that does become a point where I’m no longer able to function I’m crying all

the time I’m angry all the time you know and and obviously I couldn’t hold down my job but I’ve done it for two years so

I certainly was functioning and my parents never knew other than the people that I was taking

heroin with nobody knew um you know you could pass office

just smoking cannabis I think well I find really interesting is you said that you tried to get off it so

you obviously had you know a will to get off and you wanted to get off it and you tried am I right saying 13 times to go cold

turkey and I I was wondering when I was reading this at any point Paul did you think oh do you know what it would just

be easier to succumb to the drugs yeah those those 13 times

um a few of those times are not through choice Marcus that was through

drug dealers in Edinburgh getting busted I mean or being able to

get the drug so I was forced Antigone called turkey on those occasions and that was harder

that was hard though um the times where I would look at my mom and dad’s eyes I would see the tears

in their eyes the third tears in my eyes and I’d be promising them to the bottom of my heart

give me like 20 pounds one last time and I promise mama stop and that’s all they wanted for me was

just to stop and I was promised on time after time that I would stop 100 sincere

Paul when you were saying that 100 me and I mean and that and you know that broke my heart and what it done was

when I was in a when I was unable to stop after promising my mom that I would

that made things worse it made that it made me want to take heroin even more to

forget about what I was putting my mum through you know to be to be straight and have

to live with the guilt the embarrassment and the shame that I’ve put on my family that was no that was near an option for

me I couldn’t equipped with that so heroin was my was my friend so I knew

that heroin would take those feelings of me so it sort of dealt me deeper in as

things went on and more times I promised the more 20 pounds I’ve got and never stopped that just made me go into a much

darker world and and you give up yeah and that’s that’s the hardest bit is is

that is that given up because once you give up you’re just waiting to die I get the

Escape I get why you would take it again and again because we’re all full of good intentions and then you just think oh do

you know what if it’s not heroin it’s just a few more beers to numb it a bit or just take the edge off I I get it I

think the interesting thing is that what you’ve found to get yourself out of it was a kind of non-traditional method you

went in you did a course that wasn’t this thing really fascinated me that wasn’t to do with kicking it it was

about investigating your creative subconscious and that worked for you yeah and that’s why I do what I do and I

will keep banging my drum and I will keep sharing my story um and I will keep banging on the on the

doors of the government and tell them what was it about what did this course

do for you how did it kind of rewire your brain so it was it was

um it was through sardinians which is a homeless charity in Edinburgh um I was accepted during the course

and on the fourth week of that course there was a American psychologist guy

called Ruth ice who was going to teach us about the power in the mind nothing

to do with addiction whatsoever and I was like shut up you know I’m an addict I’m always going to be an addict and

there’s this crazy psychologist is not going to be able to teach me anything um it’s not going to be as easy as or

the poem in their mind you know to decide to stop and that’ll be it because that’s not going to work so I was very

negative minded about it but I went to the course and I sat and I listened to the guy talking about self-talk

um the way that I portray myself in the mirror the way that I think about myself on a daily basis the subconscious mind

the creative subconscious mind and and all these things and it was crazy because initially I didn’t take it on

board or I believed that I didn’t take it on board because I never stopped straight away I

went back to drugs and you know it was a couple of months later

and the 14th of May 18 years ago and I woke up in the morning you know I’m I’m an eight stone

skeleton my ribs are shown I look in the mirror and you know I’ve got the black circles I’m all white and gone like a

scale and I look in the mirror and I felt that something was different and I couldn’t quite pinpoint what it

was and then everything made sense what this guy what this psychologist was

telling me about it being a choice and who has the power to make the choices in my life whereas Amazon was

off the belief that it was up to my parents and my brothers and the government or the doctor or it’s always

somebody else’s job to decide what’s right for me or what I should or

shouldn’t do and I always had that belief in the realization in that mirror when I looked at myself square and I

said don’t ask for hero and ever again because you’re never getting it

that was me asking myself what do I want in life and then I split second I was able to

answer straight away without even having to think about it because all I wanted back then in life was not to be ahead on

addict so in the murder when I asked myself the question and I got the instant answer and I got the Goosebumps

the size of golf balls and I realized I’ve done it and it was as quick and instant as that

I knew you know cold turkey hasn’t even set in yet send a pipeline I can feel

that I’m not real and I’ve only got another one or two before I’m in State

um and I knew that time you know I’m never gonna touch our drug ever again I can’t

tell my parents because they’re more believe me yeah I can’t tell everyone because I’ve relaxed so many times that

they’re just gonna say yeah this is just going to be another one of those occasions it’ll go back on it a few days

um but I knew myself and that was all because I learned about

me I learned about who I was and the realization that as my choice what I

do in life not anybody else’s and this is what Let’s Lose taste character was telling me is it’s my

choice it’s up to me to decide what I want so I will decide not to be ahead on

addict I will decide to get better I will decide to get extremely fit I will

decide to get a job I will get a car back I will get a flat I will get a good old friend I will do something in my

life turned it to be the squash guards could have been absolutely anything Scott’s care

supporting Scots away from home in London

your life at this point must have been devoid a structure devoided discipline and even with this kind of epiphany that

you have in strong-minded Epiphany you could have said you know what I’ll get back on the straight and narrow I’ll get

a job in the library I’ve got a job in Sainsbury’s but you joined the Scots guards I mean that’s you how did you

adapt physically and mentally to from where you were to one of the toughest regiments in the world from that moment

in the mirror 18 years ago um artist personalistat Ian then I

turned my addiction from heroin to running so I used to run around the Edinburgh Forest company everywhere

um and I literally was addicted to running and over time I started to get extremely fit

then I got a job then things just started to my life was good my life was better my

life was amazing this mindset that I had was allowing me to start to be happy but

there was something missing in my life and I didn’t know what it was it was a bit like an itch and I just I just felt

like you know it’s amazing what I’ve done getting clean my family approved in

me my friends are proud to me people that didn’t even know me are proud of me for getting clean but for me I was I

didn’t really feel that sense of Pride and I thought you know I need just need to do something before it’s too late any

disrespect to anybody that works in a supermarket but I remember sitting on the forklift thinking you know I didn’t

want I didn’t want to draw my pensioner here driving this forklift I feel like I should be doing something else and I

don’t know what it is that’s enough paper on my on my lunch break and I said Army be the best and that was

it I read it and that was when nurse realization is that

you know I’m on the mindset I can do anything that I want how about been a soldier yeah because 30 at this

point weren’t you yeah so I’m approaching off the fifth birthday and the age to join the Army used to be

27 the cutoff age okay so even though I’m reading that newspaper article in my mind I’m

thinking about that there aren’t the cut off each for the Army is 27 so I’m too old my 10 TBR Soldier has been and gone

that’s too late I can’t remember what I was doing in Edinburgh I was along at Chadwick place at the West End and I was

walking past and I seen the Army office and I thought well maybe if I can’t be a soldier I enjoy cooking you know I could

be a chef or maybe there’s something else that I could maybe do so for whatever reason I walked into the office

and there’s a pipe major in the Scotts guards sitting there and then and it just looks at me and says how old are

you and I say like 30. this isn’t you fit I see JR says I love to eat some boxing

now um I run every single day this is right you know keep keep it up

I’ll get you the squat scarves and it was a it was it was such a short interview and handing me a loads of

pamphlets and then it was that that whole thing I didn’t even know who the Scottish guards were brilliant I had the

idea of Marcus what about that clue like so I ran home

and then I’m watching I’m watching these things on on the laptop and it’s like oh

toy soldiers yeah oh he’s telling me I can be a toy soldier um I have to take a few seconds and then

I thought you know what everybody’s gonna laugh if I see that I’m going to become a

soldier at 30 after the life that I’ve laid everybody I’ll laugh and at that point you weren’t really a royalist or

you weren’t the fan of the royal family or the queen no and and that’s this is

the thing as well certainly on social media people make up their own assumptions about me

because I was a Scott yeah and growing up and stuff I lived in an area called

Craig and Craig and Technic not too far for Leith no I’m a Habs fan so as a Habs

fan I’m not allowed to support the queen that’s what Omar Rangers and hearts fans

do yeah that’s that’s what it was like you know we were we were with the heads

and the Celtic we were together and all my hips all my heart’s friends and my Rangers friends every weekend they used

to come out the Union Jacks and say God Save the Queen sing all the songs and then all the hips fans and the and the

Celtic fans would come out and sing all the ird songs you know and that was life growing up so

you know for me to end up guarding the queen let’s say Buckingham Palace and present an Armstead you know

it was it wasn’t a lifelong dream as some people portray it to be it was me

at the age of 30. wanted to do something positive and do

something good with my life to something you know to scratch that action just do

something and you know it just so happened that when I went into the

recruitment office it was a pipe major to the Scots sitting there could have been any regiment I ended up in and I’m

I’m glad it was the score Scots because it was just a crazy time and did that

give you another uh level of structure to your life you

know I’ve got a few friends I’ve been in the Army and come out the Army and and they’ve done okay but they did both and

met when they were in the Army you know you’re told when to get up you’re told when to eat your tour when it looked left look right and then and then when

you look into stats of the amount of ex-service people that struggle when they come out of the army you know I think it’s six percent are homeless in

the UK or or ex-service people and 30 are homeless in the US are ex-service people as well it’s a difficult life and

to come out of the army and then find another structure isn’t it yeah and it’s more difficult for for the younger ones

if you join an armies 18 or as soon as you may be in the cadets and you’ve only had this lifeish

structure and discipline and you’ve always been told what to do where to go and what time to be there

and you’ve always been um punished if you’ve if you’ve played

up you know and you’ve always had that in your life and then you leave it’s very very difficult for these

everyone but certainly younger the younger guys when they’ve only ever known a life a having that structure and

then when it’s taken away and they can’t come back here in the Seventh Street and the struggle and it’s and as that is

that lack it’s that Lackey structure that they’re missing like you said there’s a lot of homeless

vet veterans and stuff and it’s it’s just that such a shame for me I was you

know I was steady I was I was older than everybody Marcus I’m older than my platoon Commander I’m older than all my

sergeants and my GoPros I’m older than them all I’ve already lived a life

prior to joining I’ve already have already been broken down mentally

and built myself back up so as much as the Army teaches so much

an army do you know they break you down a little bit and build you back up to be this amazing Soldier or amazing Gardener

and that’s what they were doing they never really worked for me because in my mind I’d already been in that dark place

and that already broke myself back up so when I left at 2015 I was medically discharged after

breaking my back and crushing my spine that reintegration in a civilian life I didn’t find it as difficult as I’m sure

a lot of the guys did um you know because it was it was only

five years and you know state it was from 30 years old till 35 so I didn’t struggle as much

as as what a lot of other guys do what I struggled with was obviously

the the amount of drugs that I was on by the doctor yeah that might must have been scary for you too

almost go into back into this landscape that you’d worked so hard to get out of yeah I went through soccer at times you

know I’m sitting in the same flat that I used to take care of and I’m sitting there getting wasted on tramadol and

codeines and diazepams and sleep in tablets and and I’m sitting there broken

physically but more so mentally and I’m sitting in this flat and I’m thinking looking at

the same four walls and thinking this whole Army chapter in my life was a dream did it really happen sitting

wallowing in self-pity and just becoming really bitter with the world because it would have happened my

military career was ended through Norfolk Imon

um and I believe that I was being punished because I was I have an addict earlier

on in life and I remember I used to sit and think that that’s what’s happened though I’m just being punished it’s like

they’ve dangled dangled a carrot for me and and now I’m paying the price for

Omar drug user alone in life so how did you get off that again was it more positive visualization to uh and what

happens with you I presume you still have back issues then would you just live in pain with your back yeah so I just live in the pain now

um what happened is I wrote a book I was I’ve been writing the book for a whole a long long Parts in my Rehabilitation a

drug counselor once said you know you should write down how you feel so I’ve done that and then I wrote a lot about

when I was in the Army in Canada um some exercises I used to sit with my

notepad in pain and write bits about my life and then at the beginning I locked down you know I’m on all these tablets

I’m smoking a lot of cannabis I um better one self-pity my wife comes in and says

you know we’re gonna there’s this virus you’re not going to be able to go out so I was like oh I might be a couple of

weeks in what will I do I said you know what I might just I might just finish this book once and for all and just

write it so I dug out all the paper and I sat for three days and three nights writing the book and an amazing

thing happened Marcus we are um I am sitting right and about the time in the mirror 18 years ago yeah

this crazy American psychologist teaching me about the subconscious and the creative subconscious and self-talk

and I’m writing about this a light bulb went off again in my mind where I’m sitting and I’m thinking what the hell

are you doing what are you actually doing you letting everybody else you’re letting all these spinal Specialists

tell you that you used to be on drugs for the rest of your life and that you have to accept it all the military

doctors all the civilian doctors are telling you you’re on drugs you’re on drugs and you’ve accepted it

because I was like shame on you you know better there’s one you know you’re not gonna know what it’s going to be like

unless you try and stop so when I finish the book I decided I’m going to come up

on my meds come off all the Cannabis and see how my back how I can cope with the

back pain and I just tapered off slowly and just every day just reducing a

little bit less a little bit less you know met through the whole withdrawals went through all the the Mind problems

that that come way break in an addiction but in a very strong mindset through

re-educating myself whilst I was writing the book um and realizing it’s up to me

ask yourself the question what do you want boom I think it would be a drug addict I

never use the word heroin because obviously I’m you know 18 years ago it was heroin there it was I didn’t want to be a drug

addict so I put things in place and you know and I just kept chipping away and I

come off and I realized that we have an actual spine I’m in physical pain

anyway you know I’m getting all these copious amounts of drugs for the doctors

my back’s still sore so doesn’t it make sense when I stopped the drugs my back

was still sore so you know initially I was angry

I was angry I wasn’t even angry at the doctor so I was angry at myself I was like you’ve just been you you’ve

just spent five years in your life taking all these drugs and the truth of

the matter is that you didn’t need as many of those drugs as but probably what you thought you did or what you were

told you that and only through gauge in yourself have you have you realized that you

didn’t need one of these trucks you didn’t need any of them I’m two years and six months drug free

um and that’s amazing it’s amazing for me because I totally believed that I was going to

end up an up here addict for the rest of my life again and I’ve done it again for the second

time around the book must have given you a fabulous sense of worth because it got loads of good reviews

heroin to hero and they got turned into uh a play at the Edinburgh festival and

every review I read about it it is fantastic this is a great thing I

mean does it give you a sense of worth do you feel pleased about this yeah so when when I when I finished the book and

I’m I’m and I’m thinking about publishing it and I’m thinking about my family

and I’m thinking about what people will think you know some of the things that I speak

about in the book are quite deep and brutally honest with the words that I speak and the words that I write so I

was starting thinking you know what am I going to do and then I was like right I’m going to publish it

but what I want to do is I want to give all the profits to homelessness in Scotland it was strange because as soon

as I had that thought it made sense I didn’t know that thought even existed

I’ve only been home much very briefly sofa surfing sleeping in stairwells all

day sleeping in the car I’ve never had it I’ve never had it hard but when I was actually setting lesson in a Tom Walker

and it was um leave a light on sitting listening to that song

what am I going to do publish the book what now then what why don’t you give all the money away to

homelessness in Scotland and help some of these people out there that are not getting helped so it made sense as soon

as I thought about boom that’s what I’m doing you know and it should face my family one of the best please because

you know I’m just I’m giving away all this money and it’s well over thirteen thousand pounds now

so live on the best please for me but for me you know it felt right and it

does feel right and you know one day Marcus Heron to Hero

will explode all over the world and I will make

a lot more than thirteen thousand pounds through that book and I might you know I may have to die before that happens

hopefully not but you know that book forevermore will help homeless people

somewhere in Scotland because um as much as you know I was a Scottsman

down in London and stuff I’m very much I played Scotsman and as well so that’s

what that’s what I want to do with that book but it was a massive feeling a

prayed and it was a real real genuine fionaire Pride made me happy and it

still makes me happy today and I always walked till the day I die where can we buy this book

um so it’s on Amazon so I just I self-published because the Publishers

and stuff to take such a large chunk yes um and royalties they’re the ones that

are going to benefit financially through my book and that didn’t really sit well with me I thought you know I’ll go to

social media I’ll get my social media my Facebook and Instagram and I’ll talk about the book and I’ll promote it and

that’ll generally that means I’ll get more money from Amazon to give to the homeless people

rather than a publisher and benefit and from it so that’s what I’ve done and it’s been not too bad

you know during the play at Edinburgh Fringe headlining Army at The Fringe in

all places there’s a digital copy that’s just going to be released soon to Marcus and I’ve no watch that I’ve not watched

at all yet I’ve only watched a few minutes um a mess up yeah I’ll bet and that’s

what a mess watching it it’s totally done an amazing Joby creating you know through through reading the

book and rock MMA on Zoom calls and he’s created this our show and it’s a one-man

show um it’s just done an amazing job and again it’s going to open up doors

hopefully it’ll be brilliant to see it come to London or see it come to Glasgow or somewhere like that that’d be lovely

let’s keep in touch please come on again and I sincerely hope you I I’d like to

see it you know I’ve not been in Edinburgh Fringe in about 25 years and every time I went there when I was when I was a kid I really enjoyed it I hope

it comes to London I’ll definitely go and see it and uh we’ll make sure we mention the book heroin to Hero Paul

thank you you’re more than welcome Marcus anything see you soon daddy bye see you bye-bye

Scott’s care support London Scots with financial grants welfare advice

counseling sheltered housing jobs coaching and family support

[Music]

 

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